Hi Elena, really sorry to hear that the specialist was REALLY unhelpful, I am confused why he did not help you all. I am surprised that the doctor said your dad's depression is because of the arguments, because as you said , it is not as simple as that and the reason why you argue is because of his drinking, or is that what your dad said? If your dad has come back and said this, maybe it's what he wants you both to think, but it's not you and your mum's fault. If your dad has suggested to the doctor that his drinking is because of his arguments with you and your mum, this is because he doesn't want to admitt that he has a problem and it is his responsibility to get help with it.
Not sure if you have ever heard of the three C's, but I thought I would share them with you. This is something that people may learn about if they go to an Al Anon (for families affected by someone's alcoholism) support group or Al Ateen group, it is also something that The National Association of Children of Alcoholics talk about. Family members may remember the three C's to remind themselves the persons drinking is not their fault.
I did not Cause it.
I can't Control it.
I can't Cure it.
It seems the doctor has not thought about what you and your mum are going through at all! Or maybe your dad did not say how much he really drinks to the doctor. I am sorry to hear that you have had a disappoinment like this and I hope that your still getting lots of support.
Emma :)
