i haven't posted here before and i haven't had too. my moms alcoholism hasn't been bad, shes been really good and got a job and really tried and she had a day off today and now shes drunk again.
i knew she was even before it had hit her, i could smell it and sense it and i refused to drive her to my sisters house. after that she left in a taxi and she hasn't come home. i don't know where she is and it scares me, now shes better we can be really close and she comes out with me in my car alot. i dread the worst when she doesn't come home, i dread losing her.
i'm really lonely, i'm only 17 and i'm not exaggerating when i say i don't have any friends. i have a boyfriend and thats it. he knows everything but i don't like to talk to him about it, he doesn't understand because hes never been affected or even close to anything like this so he doesn't know what to say, so i don't bother talking to him about things.
i don't have anyone to talk to or anything to do to take my mind off things, i just wish there was a club i could join or something i could do with my spare time. i've read the posts on here and i'm so amazed at how other peoples moms are exactly the same and they say things i really agree with.
its so hard everytime she gets drunk i tell myself i hate her and i'm not going to talk to her but when shes sober it just goes back to normal. when i was younger my nan used to come round and look after her but my nans passed away now. i just feel really alone.
