I am 15 years old, and my father is an alcoholic. I don't even really know where to start... My parents hate each other. My dad works in NYC on Broadway, and my mom is a stay at home mom. They have been fighting and arguing since I was 12 years old. My dad is drunk all of the time, and completely chances personalities. I find it a huge struggle to talk about my feelings, and rarely ever do. My dad is also very depressed and feels like the world is out to get him. He relies on cooking to get through everything. He stays late at work, so he doesn't have to come home. My dad is always talking trash about my mom, and my mom is always talking trash about my dad. I have a boyfriend who helps me cope with everything going on, but it's gotten to the point that I just can NOT take it anymore. I am adopted, and have recently found my birthparents, and it has just been a competition between sets of parents since. It makes me so upset when my dad is drunk, and i just can't handle it. He's ruining my life, and I can't even begin to explain what this feels like. My mom is like the nicest person ever, she is trying so hard to make everything better. We have some family therapist that my dad, mom, and sister go to. I have never been, because I have never complained. Although, at dinner one night, my dad was drunk and I gave him attitude because it made me upset, he freaked out at me and I screamed "Stop drinking, you're ruining our family" and sprinted out of the door. I just explode sometimes. But I feel bad for my mom because all she has ever wanted is a great husband and a great home for her kids, and she didn't give us that. She gets soooo upset about it. I feel terrible. So I try to hide and pretend everything is alright. My sister is going away to college this year, so it's just me and my parents. I'm not going to be able to handle it.
I just need some advice and someone to please help me.
I hate my life.
